M.O.T.I.V.A.T.I.O.N.

When I saw there was going to be a Mystery Knit Along named Out of Darkness by Boo Knits starting on August 25, I knew it was the perfect motivation for finishing all my UFO (unfinished objects) and my "chore knitting" a.k.a. anything other than a shawl.   Boo Knits most frequently uses this Tussa Silk by Dye For Yarn... Now, I really have motivation!  My first Tussa silk.  I still need to find 700 beads for this little mystery...

And... finish up my UFOs!!  I did get this one finished.  Schwaan by Nora Gaughan.  Info here on Ravelry.

This is a very quick knit (though it took me months to finish it!) worked with a double strand of linen and cotton.

One more down, a few more to go!!  I did have one slight diversion detour from finishing my chore knitting I will share later.  ;)  Now, on to the day!!  blessings to all ~ tanna

The Garter Stitch: A Love Affair

My very first experiences with knitting were as a child.  And, the first stitch I learned was the "knit" stitch.  If you only do a knit stitch, the pattern created is called a Garter Stitch.

My first projects seemed crude... slippers with heavy yarn.  On one hand, I was excited to learn something new... on the other, the crudeness did not strike joy in my heart.  This experience gave me a certain disdain for the simplicity of the Garter Stitch.  I wanted "more", less simple, more complex, less basic... it was years before I would go back to learn the more complicated.  And, even more years before I could appreciate the joys of simple...

This year, through the Color Affection, the Heartbreak, the Wingspan, and the Sothia, my love and appreciation of this simple pattern has grown to full blown adoration.

It can be rustic and vintage and textured and beautiful... Compared to the precise dance of lace knitting, it is the long, slow run... the soul renewing walk... the deep breath...

Yep, it is a new love affair for an old lesson...

This is made from a free pattern by Lion Brand, called Colorplay Hoodie, knitted in their Amazing yarn in a colorway called Joshua Tree.  Machine washable.  Dry flat.

(I'm behind on my baby knitting for friends!!  And, trying to catch up!  Those shawls just draw me like a moth to the fire. )

Here's to finding new appreciation for things once looked upon with disdain... ;)

blessings to all ~ tanna

A Gift "for" the Sea, Family and Friends, and Peach Agrodolce...

Last month, my daughter and her friends (from all the way back to pre-high school) had planned a beach vacation to include all the new little members of this herd.

I had seen this pattern, Little Shells by Holly and Ella Knits (www.hollyandellaknits.com) and it sounded perfect for a seaside accessory.  There was some Rowan Organic Purelife Cotton left from Roo's Coming Home experiments... and the next thing I knew, a shawl was begun.  A gift for the sea...

Had to whisk it straight off the blocking spot to the post-office for it to make the trip.  Amanda graced me with some wonderful photos made by her friend, Lauri.

And, a treasured family photo from their vacation time.  Love this little crew!

AND, a photo of the whole little herd as it has expanded from the four girls I am so proud to know... to include some amazing husbands and precious growing families... How wonderful is that?  Makes me smile. 

And, this is a bad phone photo... but you should really give this one a try!!  Grilled Pork with Peach Agrodolce!!  My friend, Tricia at Saving Room for Dessert just posted this one and my, oh, my!!  We loved it!!

Now, if I could just get Amanda here to model ALL my knitting projects!  ;) 

blessings to all ~ tanna

In The Arms of the Angels...

Strains of Sarah McGlachlan singing, "... in the arms of the angels... fly away..." ran softly through my mind as I removed the blocking pins...

I could hardly wait to get the last pin out so I could swirl it around my shoulders...

Thoughts of angel arms and soft wings danced through my mind...

As much as I struggled with this yarn, I could not be more pleased with the outcome...

And, even though the temperatures neared 100 in our Texas heat, I wrapped these angel arms around myself, cranked the A/C up in my Mini and motored about tending my chores... with warmth on my shoulders and in my heart...

Once again, I find healing in knitting one stitch at a time... and see the lessons of struggle, perseverance and reward... A special thanks to Boo Knits for such a gorgeous pattern...

Wishing you all a wonderful weekend, surrounded by your own angel arms... whatever they may be.

blessings ~ tanna

The Birthday Boy and Speed...

I can't let this month slip past without sharing some of The Birthday Boy's Speed Adventures.  Our Little Man turned three earlier this month and we were blessed to spend the weekend celebrating with him.  This boy LOVES. HIM. SOME. SPEED, a.k.a. Lightening McQueen.

On the initial launch, there were several mishaps... Pop Pop had to do several rescues.

But, by afternoon... in a open space, it was nothing but speeeeeed....

I don't know who laughed more... him or his Momma and me...

Of course, it wasn't long before Roo and I had to start taking evasive measures!!

It just doesn't seem like three years should have passed so quickly.  These precious years that they love for you to do things with them are speeding past... then the friends and school.. and activities... and friends and college... and friends and work all take more and more of their focus... I hate this time is slipping by so fast... but, I am grateful for the moments we do share... they are treasures in my soul.

And, Little Man's appreciation of these times is one of my greatest treasures... His Momma and Daddy have taught him well. 

The week is whizzing past!  Enjoyed coffee yesterday with my step-daughter.  Such a nice pick-me-up in the afternoon!  Have a little more work left on The Old Girl.  Finished the Cloud Illusions shawl... love it.  I'll share photos soon.  I'm off to the bank and errands (then a quick trip to Rose Path, the LYS) perhaps!  ;)  blessings to all ~ tanna

Angel's Breath...

Between coats of touch-up paint on one of the Old Girls' apartments, I have started the picot bind off of this shawl...  I cannot say this one has been pure pleasure.  My old eyes strain to see this yarn and my clumsy fingers struggle to control it.  Backing up if you make a mistake... well, the best advice is not to mess up.  I have found mohair and silk to be most unforgiving in the reverse mode.

The pattern is Cloud Illusions by Boo Knits.   I do love Boo Knit patterns!!  The yarn is Debbie Bliss:  Angel, a mohair and silk combination.   Maybe not so much love... but, could be one of those things that after the pain of getting it done is past, I will be so happy with the outcome I that I forget the struggle.  The jury is still out on my opinion of this yarn.

It is as light as air... the breath of an angel... there is a long way left to go on the bind off!!  Whew!!  In from painting for the day and about to hit the shower and then get to work a little more on the picot.  It obviously has not been blocked yet and I always look forward to seeing the transformation that blocking brings to lacework.  More to come...

I cannot begin to tell you how blessed I feel by the words of encouragement and the sharing of your stories on my previous posts in your comments and your e-mails... Indeed, I know women who fill the bill for beautiful in Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's words.  Absolutely beautiful women... inside and out.  Thank you each and every one.

blessings ~ tanna

On a Lighter Note(card)...

I have to be the luckiest blogger in the world... I received another package with special treats this week...

These six beautiful note cards are from Wanda, at Got A Minute or Two?

We share a love of God, family and watercolor.  She is an amazing artist.  I WISH I could paint like her.  Her faith is inspiring and her prayers powerful.  I am so blessed to have come to know her through the blog world. 



This is the second time I have won one of her wonderful giveaways!!  And, she included a sweet note that says:

"Please use these!  There is more where these came from!"  Because... I would never use my other one... saved it for myself to look at.  ;)

Thank you so much, dear Wanda!!  I am so glad I will get to share your art this time!  ;) 

blessings ~ tanna

"The most beautiful people we know are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.  These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern.  Beautiful people do not just happen." ~ Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Last week my leg became infected at the site of one of the lymph nodes I'd had removed on April 20, 2012.  Now, you wouldn't think it would flare into an infection this late in the game.  I'd had some trouble with that one... clip on a nerve... had to go back in and remove the clips that were staying the flow of the serous lymph fluid.  Hence, a seroma (fluid filled "tumor").  The lump was about the size of a small hen's egg (for you farm people, a pullet's egg).  It really didn't bother me too much.  Then, over the prior weekend it started getting bigger.  And, on Tuesday when I got in the shower, I noticed that the upper part of my thigh was swollen and red.  I called and went in to see the doctor who drained a good bit of the fluid and put me on antibiotics for ten days.  There seemed to be a bit of fluid still in there to me and later I had what I refer to as the "Roodle Cure". 

Over the weekend, we flew to share Alex's 3rd birthday.  It was a great pleasure to share that time with him.  And, Little Roo (Andrew, one year old) made a big jump on his Noni's "lump".  I am pretty sure he broke the rest of that fluid free.  At any rate, I got the "Roodle Cure" and today I can report that it is almost completely resolved.

Point of this story being.... sometimes we have wounds that never seem to completely heal.  They lie dormant waiting for a moment to flare back up again.  This one did because there was fluid just sitting there... walled away from a blood supply that could offer healing from my own body.   It needed to be drained, opened up, released.  I think feelings can be the same way.  I felt relief yesterday when I wrote those words... and, I felt shame.  Shame that with so much for which to be grateful, I still whine about my sorrow.  I look around myself and I see so many others with much heavier burdens.  My children and grandchildren are healthy and my step-son-in-law, though still suffering through chemo, is responding well to treatment.  I have a loving husband.  We have income.  I want to shake myself out of it; kick myself in the butt; just get over it; move on; accept... that there are relationships that may never be whole.  I do not mean to be coy or secretive... but, these stories are not mine alone.

I believe every family shares a thread of some kind of trouble and pain.  I read the quote by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and I recognize by your comments that I am surrounded by beautiful people.  Each comment, each beautiful person sharing their compassion, released tears that slid quitely down my face... each one released some of the pent up hurt.  No doubt, some of these wounds have drained.  I'm not sure when I will find my way out of these depths.  I've tried many times.  I wish I could do better.  Know that your prayers were felt... and appreciated... and I believe that they are answered... in God's time. 

thank you from the bottom of my heart ~ tanna

comments off

Resurfacing...

"Have you noticed that an angry man can only get so far... until he reconciles the way he thinks things ought to be with the way they are..."  ~ My Thanksgiving by Don Henley, Stan Lynch, Jal Winding

"To want what I have and take what I'm given with grace... for this I pray..."  ~ For My Wedding  by Larry John McNally

Seems the elation and the sense of life and freedom one gains after learning the cancer will not claim their life dissipates after awhile... and the old concerns settle themselves back into your bones once more.  I know about "letting go" about "moving on"...  all the cliched terms and tactics for living a happy life... things I have learned well; but, how does one let go when it is your children?  Pray, tell me how.  How do you reconcile yourself to how things are without giving up hope... without giving up them?

The sorrow that has settled in my soul distances me from God.  From my Beloved.  From myself.  I want to be free of it... but, I cannot take flight.  I cannot take flight.