Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Isolation and Standing in Deep Water...


I've been gone from blogging almost too long... I've been "gone" from lots of things... From things that bless me with connection... and inspiration... and friendship...

I've been gone from my blog friends...

Gone from my knitting friends...

Gone from my golf friends...

I like our new church... but, it is still new.

Without the connections to people who inspire us and encourage us, life begins to feel very. dried. up.


Even when it is injected with these precious ones in magical moments...

Moments are wonderful...

Moments can sustain us for awhile... but, they are not the day-in to day-out living of life...

I'll not lie that I'm not still sad, in a deep, dark-little-corner-that-cannot-be-rooted-out piece of my heart, that all of our family isn't in a place to share the mundane as well as the magical. 

But, it is in the mundane day-to-day that we must. find. our. joy.


In the day in and day out living of life, I need people to feel connected to... to share with...

Otherwise, I feel alone... and, to borrow a phrase from Jewel, like I am standing in deep water and bailing myself out with a straw...

Life has been dishing out a LOT of deep water.  That deep water has sucked up my time and, even more, my energy... my joy. It has brought on isolation from my friends and connections.  There is still work ahead.  However, I have recognized that I have to take time to feed my soul with friendships that I miss... and need...

Right now my inboxes hold 2665 e-mails... most of those are junk, but I have rooted out such amazing treasures this morning.  If for a minute you think that your life cannot really be touched or that friendships cannot be developed with people you have never met... you would be dead wrong.  To those of you who took the time to write... who gave me the sweet, sweet, sweet gift of concern, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  I am blessed beyond measure.  B.e.y.o.n.d. measure.  Know that I have wondered and cared about your days too... and I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and time is nearing that I can visit again.

 
Since the my last post, we have readied and leased four units of The Old Girls with one left to go.  LOTS of cleaning, painting and a couple of bathroom remodels in the mix.  That is an unusually high turnover for us in this time frame... Some were brought on my "inviting" the tenants to move on... Another because the tenant lost their job and had to move home.... A couple that would have been normal.  At any rate, it has been brutally busy.  Without the help of these two... in particular, Zack, I would have truly been overwhelmed.  I am so grateful for his helping hands and loving heart.  Little Miss B adds a dose of sunshine when she works with us.  ;)  God has blessed me indeed. 
 
 
Hardly a day has passed in this frenzy that I have not told Zack:  God always gives us enough.  Enough time.  Enough energy.  Enough resources.  Sometimes it doesn't feel like it, but it. is. enough.

"Each of us does, in effect, strike a series of deals or compromises between the wants and longings of the inner self, and an outer environment that offers certain possibilities and sets certain limitations."  ~ Maggie Scarf

"As I grow older, part of my emotional survival plan must be to actively seek inspiration instead of passively waiting for it to find me."  ~ Bebe Moore Campbell

May you seek and find inspiration today...

blessings ~ tanna

40 comments:

From the Kitchen said...

I have missed you! I knew you were busy with the new house. And, I always "drop in" on my "hometown homies" so I know you all have had some good times together. Take care, my friend. I'll see you around when you have the time.

Best,
Bonnie

Christine said...

What a surprise to see your post in my inbox!
Whew! You made my day.

I know JUST how you feel. I went through all those emotions when we moved. The emotional part is always the hardest.

God has put on my heart and I have been working on being CONTENT.

Deb said...

Oh, those pictures are lovely, Tanna. Your family is so beautiful. I hope you find contentment in your new surroundings soon. Hugs, Deb

Pammy Sue said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pammy Sue said...

I found some inspiration right here! You have been sorely missed! Glad all is well and you are just busy with life-sucking things. Your family is beautiful! ♥

TexWisGirl said...

great to 'see' you again, tanna! sounds like you have been extremely busy and emotionally hurting, too. i'm sorry for that. glad the leasing has turned over and hopefully good tenants are in place. as for missing family, i do know how that is.

i hope your days can return to more normal times, soon!

Kerin said...

Hi sweet friend.
Nice to see a post from you again.

Life certainly is full of hills and valleys, isn't it??!!

I like your attitude of gratitude.
I agree, we Must seek the good in life, no matter what trials we are faces with.

You're family pictures are sweet, and your Grands are all growing up so quickly.

Looking forward to reading more. Sending you warm, happy wishes for sunny days, and bright days.

K.

Amanda said...

Hugs. And love. And hugs. And love. And hugs. And love. And hugs. And love. And hugs. And love. I know that "picking up the mat to move on" isn't easy. Knowing you have been Given the strength is one thing. *Feeling* that strength is another. Praying your knowledge will be accompanied with feeling so that each step forward brings renewed hope and joy. We love you more than words can say. xoxo

Tricia Buice said...

I was getting ready to find a phone number for you and call and say "where are you?" You have been missed by us all and we are so grateful you came back to us. We've been helping our daughter and son-in-law renovate an old house. It is still not liveable but one day my grandson will have his own room, a backyard, a home. We paint and clean and demo - and boy am I tired. I also work full time - so this is a labor of love - going on for months and months. Glad you are getting to the end of the clean-up time. Hope the rest of your summer is an easy one! Thanks - we really missed you.

SouthernHeart said...

I have missed you so much, Tanna! I understand the "place" you're in and am digging myself out of it as well. I love the pics of your family! Beautiful and such a blessing. I will keep you in my prayers for your posts are always so welcomed in my inbox! Blessings, Dianne

Sandy said...

I've certainly missed you, dear one. It was pure joy to see your post today. The family look as beautiful as ever and that includes you. Hope you enjoy the rest of your summer and I look forward to hearing from you again soon.
xx oo

Schnitzel and the Trout said...

Such a pleasant surprise and such beautiful family photos. I just knew you'd be O.K. in time. It does take time. Thanks for touching us all again. Susan

Amy at love made my home said...

I am so glad to read this post from you even though you have been having some tough times. I didn't feel that I "knew" you enough to enquire if you were OK, but I have been thinking of you and sending good thoughts. I hope that things settle soon and that you can get some time to get out and about and enjoy your new home and some new experiences and friends. Take care and I look forward to it not being so long next time! xx

Bonnie said...

Tanna, I was so glad to see your post today and doubly glad to have a visit from you too!!!! I have missed your sweet zest for life and ENERGY! I was constantly amazed at how fast you could do knitting projects as well as life. You have always been so encouraging to me and I cherish your friendship. I was getting ready to send an email and inquire about you. Lost my blog roll and it has been a pain. If you aren't backing up your blog I can send you a link to tutorials.

Loved the beautiful family photo on a gorgeous beach. Looks like the Gulf Coast to me. I know how much you love your family. Glad you were together.

Hoping all your hard work recently will calm down and you can show us your new house. So glad you are back. Bonnie



Marie said...

Praise the Lord! What a blessing for me to come to your blog today and there is a post. It is such a delight to see you and your family. I have not posted in a while but I have been busy. Our son and family have been here from CA for over two weeks and have now gone back home. Oh, how I miss little Noah, age 3, already.
Love to you!
Marie

podso said...

A big sigh here to hear that you are doing Ok and moving ahead one foot at a time if need be. I admire you plugging ahead when your heart is lagging. I have times feeling that way and I haven't moved. I don't think i realized how big a change this was for you, needing to change church and leave your knitting pals, etc. I think it maybe is harder as we get older? We don't have those instant connections our children draw us to with others. Your family is looking wonderful--those handsome boys are getting so big and the littlest -- the baby is not a baby anymore. So sweet, all three girls ...Wow!

Shug said...

First of all....wonderful photos of a beautiful family!! I have missed you and I think it was just night before last that I went to your blog, just to check on you. I know..sometimes life can be sooo overwhelming!! Hopefully you can begin to see the light of day. It truly is great to hear from you today. Many Blessings...
shug

Cheryl @ TFD said...

I'm so happy to see your post! I've been wondering where you were and how you were doing. I know you've been extremely busy and losing connections makes the burden of busyness even heavier. I hope your days will soon be more peaceful and less stressful and that you make many new friends where you now live! Your photos are wonderful with all your beautiful family!
Take care! Hugs, Cheryl

Pondside said...

Like so many others, I am glad to 'see' you again. It sounds like your basket has been over-full but you have managed to put it down for a moment and reach out. I hope you find as much comfort in the many comments as I found in your post. Sometimes you just don't realise the impact you can have just in sharing. Thank you.
Your family is beautiful - it must be hard to be so far apart (something that I know as well!). I know you treasure every get-together.

Judy S. said...

It was fun to come home today after being computer-less for a week and find your post! I've missed you, too, but figured you were very busy getting settled. Sounds like you've had a lot of other stuff to deal with as well. Loved the photos of your family and so glad you had some time to "come up for air"! Hope you'll find time to post again soon. Hugs!

Margaret Birding For Pleasure said...

Hi Tanna It was wonderful see your blog this morning in my dashboard and to hear all your news. You photographs of your family are really lovely and very special. God bless you.

karen said...

I've missed you and I'm glad to know that you are well. Life does get busy doesn't it? Not only does the blogging community connect liked minded people, they are there when you are ready to reconnect :)

Donna said...

Hi! Hi! Hi! I have missed you but am in the same boat as you….busy boat! Have thought of you often. We are making progress on the house building but it is so slow and so time/soul consuming that I am almost to the point of sort of resenting the whole idea….some days. Most days I can see the blessing…when I am not exhausted and hurting in all my muscles. I don't even want to take pictures or write on my blog…maybe someday.
Love you friend….miss you….let's be strong and brave together. God loves us and does give us just enough!

Wanda said...

I've watched for you...I've thought about you, and prayed for you...and was thrilled to see a post from you.

Much has happened on our end as well, but not in a sad but happy vein.

We've moved and we love it. Hope to fill you in later but in the mean time Welcome back dear friend...YOU have been missed. The pictures are so darling.

Mereknits said...

Tanna, you have been missed my friend. I have thought about you many times and hoped that you were adjusting to your new home. Sounds like lots has been going on, it seems that way everywhere you look, globally and personally. I wish for you some peace, and the very fact you can notice the moments that matter means you are dealing with things the very best you can.
I am sending you a hug,
Meredith

SImple and Serene Living said...

Tanna, please know that you have been missed. I was so happy to see your post come up in my feed today. Life is a struggle for so many of us these days. I am happy that you have had some time with your beautiful family. xo Laura

Trudy said...

So nice to see your smile again. What a beautiful family. Hope to see more of you. Time heals all, and God is good.. Hugs , look forward to more of you adventures.
Trudy

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Hi Tanna, It is so good to hear from you.. Sounds like like is GOOD --but extremely busy. Seems as if many of us bloggers have been very busy this summer. The older I get, the faster time flies!!!!! Hopefully, you (and I) will get to sit down and relax one of these days... Hope so!!!!

Come and visit when you have a chance.
Hugs,
Betsy

Stitchy Mc Floss said...

I have missed your sweet self! I always love to read about what is going on in your life. Your family is so beautiful and I can see the love on all their smiling faces.

Blessings to you and yours always sweet friend. ((hugs))

Janettessage.blogspot.com said...

Beautiful post and I can relate in so many ways. Hugs from this side of Texas. The pictures are great. Glad you got the girls fixed up. Construction is going on for two of my adult children here, and it is keeping everyone busy.

Nonna Rose said...

It is so great to have you back!!! Love the family pictures; what treasures! The kitchen looks great, but I can't wait to see pictures of the rest of the house, you always inspire me to decorate, knit, and to be loving....you are an inspiration my blogging friend.

LauraLillyLaura said...

Love your post and your pictures. You are right. Tough times are never fun.I rather hate them an try to avoid them if possible because them come way too often.
I've decided to not think about the sad stuff and today since my bday is near I had pizza and a beer at 10. As Deanne would say "Why not". We have to find the fun, maybe I will have a nap and swim. If we can't make a bit of fun every now and then I think it gets too much. Have a fun weekend, do something unexpected.
Love ya!!!

kathy b said...

Tanna

YOu have my prayers this afternoon. I know I'd have trouble moving from this house, but it must be someday. I will learn from you.
I LOVE your family photo on the beach.
I love your honesty about difficult times.

I wish you a peaceful evening and some unparalleled beauty in nature that refreshes you

Susan McClaskey said...

I have stepped away from leaving notes on blogs but I haven't stopped checking for updates from you. SO happy to see you back and am looking forward to see the magic you work on your new space. I know you will come to love it as you make it your own. Best,
Susan

Anonymous said...

Lovely to see you here again Tanna. I have stopped blogging myself...it was hard to accept that but finally realized after several starts and stops that my life just didn't have the time for it anymore. I have since developed a lovely community on Facebook...not as in depth but still the connections and sharings. (are you there?)

Your family is growing so much and as beautiful as ever. I do hope that the deep water has ebbed for you now...at least somewhat and that you are well. I also hope that knitting is still bringing you joy and comfort. Sending love to you!

Sharon Lee Smith said...

What a pleasure to hear your voice. I was thrilled by your comment on my blog the other day. It is the little things that guide us from moment to moment. So glad your journey is reconnecting you.

California Girl said...

Good to see you back on the grid happy & healthy! Grandkids are awfully cute.

Pat @ Mille Fiori Favoriti said...

Nice to see you back to blogging, Tanna! We all need to take time away to get the priorities accomplished. I loved your family photos at the beach. We celebrated at the Outer Banks in NC recently and wanted to take photos like these but could not co-ordinate everyone's schedules for a group shot until almost the last day and it was thunder-storming that day--lol!

steph said...

know you have been missed.....happy dancing that you are back!!! you are so right.....there IS enough energy for all the things you need to do---- but you must be astute and know where to direct it and when. You've been where you need to be!! (just glad you're here with us now!!!!!!)

Catherine said...

Dear Tanna, It is good to see you back and blogging. I have thought of you so often and wondered.
I keep you in my prayers. Blessings dear and a hug, Catherine

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Numbers 6:24-26

The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.